Are we losing role models?

Role models hold a significant place in our lives, guiding us through challenges and inspiring us to thrive for our goals. Regardless of age, whether in youth or adulthood the presence of role models is invaluable.

They embody values, characteristics and a work ethic which we aspire to emulate. Role models don’t need to have big fame, money or astounding success, true role models can go about their daily life and there is a lot we can take just by observing them and how they show up. They don’t need to be perfect either, in fact the best role models have gone through their share of failures, challenges and are still navigating these but they are doing it with a sense of resilience and integrity.

Growing up I felt the absence of role models and support systems. I was the first girl in my immediate and extended family to attend university. I grew up in a low-income household where we didn’t have much and life’s challenges hit very early on. When you come from such circumstances, people treat you differently – even family.

Amongst this I didn’t have anyone to shape my ambition, behaviour, and choices. It didn’t mean I didn’t get to where I wanted to be, but the journey was a lot harder than if I had mentors and role models to guide me. It was one of the reasons why I became so passionate about mentoring, particularly with young people. Like myself, young people often find themselves facing situations beyond their control, circumstances which they didn’t choose but must navigate, nonetheless. That’s why it is important that they have access to a diverse range of role models to challenge the belief that where you start in life will ultimately dictate where you end up.

This doesn’t mean role models should replace parents or teachers. While some young people may not find the role models they need among their parents or teachers, others do. But they can still benefit from the presence of other inspiring individuals.

Through mentoring and even in the workplace I have seen the huge impact role models can have, suddenly you start believing in your potential, believing that if they can do it so can you. It is not always about achievement either, some role models are just there to remind us how to show up in the world, to be kind, humble and understanding people. How to contribute and serve to society – there was a reason why we spent years looking up to people like Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King. Quite often in the world of mentoring, I see so many young boys look up to footballers, not for the fame but for their skill – they aspire to reach a similar level of excellence which they now know is possible.

As I reflect on this, there is a part of me which worries that the concept of role models is becoming diluted. With the rise in social media, screens are replacing real life people. And what you see through screens is never the full picture, even when someone is sharing their challenges it is curated in a way to get more visibility rather than focusing on what principles to adhere to. The rise of fame hasn’t unfortunately meant the rise of leadership; we start following people based on numbers and visibility rather than what they stand for. This is not to say that there are no good role models out there even on social media, but they are being overshadowed by those playing the algorithm game or those shouting the loudest (you will be surprised how many people are admiring Donald Trump and consider him as a role model!) In turn, young people are taking onboard a definition of success which revolves around fame and fortune rather than enhancing their happiness,

integrity and having a positive impact.

Furthermore, as we have taken on board society’s definitions of success, we find ourselves trapped in a cycle that makes it harder to truly reflect on what it is we want and what are our values. The fear of embracing authenticity and living as our true selves often leads to conformity. We prioritise fitting into moulds rather than expressing individuality. This not only diminishes our sense of self but contributes to the scarcity of authentic role models who inspire others to live in alignment with their values and purpose.

So I want to leave you with this reflection – to ask yourself if you are living authentically guided by your values and purpose? Are you embodying the principles and qualities you wish to see in the world? And if you are unsure on the answer, then I invite you to redefine what you are considering as success and to not be afraid to make this definition personalised to you. Not only will this allow you to live a more fulfilling life but there is a whole generation behind you who can then follow in your footsteps – it doesn’t take much to inspire change.

Let it start with you.